Monday, June 23, 2008

I'm a fabulous nobody...

you can't determine my happiness anymore...

I really tried to attain this idea of perfection, but made myself seriously unhappy in the process and ended up with more imperfections that I started with...I let things go too far, and I'm ashamed.
but I'm changing, I'm not like that anymore, that's just not me, or who I want to be...I've wasted time, and I'm happy to say that I think it's all over.

someone's always going to be better, prettier, smarter, and funnier than me, and I guess I'm okay with that, now...I just don't care anymore, I want to go back to the me I was, when everything was a big adventure, when I used to get stuck in tables, laugh at myself, talk about the most random of things, have my friends love me...I really loved being like that, being so care-free.

last week I was forced to get better, but it was for the wrong, I'm getting better for me, and nobody else.

I'm sorry to all my friends that I've worried lately, I know I've done some crazy stuff, and I didn't mean to hurt any of you...I just want you all to forgive me...I know I've messed up big time, but I think it's all going to be okay.
I'm learning to re-love myself, treat myself with respect, and I don't care if I'm not loved by anyone else, because as long as I love myself, that's all that matters.

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